Vol.48

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The weather outside is //

As I look outside my window // Fall is in full swing. The morning temperatures are quite crisp now; I’ve had to pull out my big Carhartt for morning chores. Yellow leaves fall from the trees like confetti. The garden has been mostly put to bed for the season, just a few more areas to weed and amend. The pace on the farm is slowing and a winter of rest is on the horizon. We’re so close! I think I can, I think I can…

As I look around the house // Four pumpkins picked from a local farm sit in a row on the kitchen table, ripe and waiting to be carved into jack-o’-lanterns. Our kitchen island is overflowing with eggs. I have a pile of warm, cozy blankets to wash and pile into the living room baskets. It’s so trite to say nowadays, but I have always loved this time of year.

Thinking about // this poem from Mary Oliver:

“I Worried” by Mary Oliver

I worried a lot. Will the garden grow, will the rivers flow in the right direction, will the earth turn as it was taught, and if not how shall

I correct it?

Was I right, was I wrong, will I be forgiven,
can I do better?

Will I ever be able to sing, even the sparrows can do it and I am, well,

hopeless.

Is my eyesight fading or am I just imagining it, am I going to get rheumatism,

lockjaw, dementia?

Finally I saw that worrying had come to nothing. And gave it up. And took my old body and went out into the morning,

and sang.

I’m less a worrier and more of an overthinker, a predict-er, a planner, a Plan A/B/C-er. While that way of thinking is sometimes helpful, it’s also so very exhausting. Lately, I’ve been practicing the art of going outside with a blank mind. No lists or plans, just intentionally seeking and naming beauty in my own backyard. Harder than it sounds (!!) but a good challenge. I feel a lot of peace when I can accomplish it.

On this week’s to-do list // – work on refilling/stocking “winter emergency packs” for each vehicle – start switching out the kids’ wardrobes – pack away my summer dresses and bring out the sweaters – move Fred from pasture into the permanent pig paddock – work on my junk journal

– give the little boys’ haircuts

Currently reading //

On the menu this week //

Monday: loaded breakfast enchiladas
Tuesday: white chicken chili
Wednesday: meatballs with mashed potatoes
Thursday: Refrigerator Cleanout Night
Friday: tomato soup and grilled cheese sandwiches